1. Air Guitar. Don’t do it. You look like a dork.
2. Hypocrites in any shape, form or fashion.
3. Rude people. I don’t care if you are the King of the World or the gal serving me my fries in the drive-thru. Treat people the way you want to be treated.
4. Women who are obviously bottle blondes who still blame their stupidity on being blonde, as in: “Oh, no! I’m having a blonde moment!” No you aren’t. You are just doing something dumb. Period.
5. The smell of syrup. It is for this reason alone that I do not eat pancakes.
6. Open cabinets/drawers. Say it with me: “Open. Close. Open. Close.” Thank you.
7. Phone people. Especially you blue-toothers.
8. Rude smokers. (I smoke, by the way). If you are within a couple of feet of the receptacle provided, put your ashes and butts IN it, not just somewhere in the vicinity. You make the rest of us look worse.
9. Spearmint gum. (Stinks!)
10. Adults who want to talk to me about my child through my child, as in, “You need to tell your mommy to sign your permission slip.” Uh, no, he does not need to tell his mommy, his mommy is standing right here. YOU tell his mommy, then his mommy will happily sign the permission slip. Have a nice day.
P.S. I reserve the right to amend the above without notice.
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